Tuesday, February 28, 2023

Are you an asshole of behemoth proportions?

There's a certain type of person that leaves a tiny bit of food in the pot, pan, or plate when serving themselves.  Sometimes it's a single chip in a bowl, a spoonful of rice in the pot, or a bite of chili.  These perpetrators may see it as a gesture of goodwill, of kindness and graciousness, but it's really an act of pure aggression to those sharing a meal or snack with this villain.  Truly, one of life's greatest "fuck you's"  is leaving a morsel of cheese, cracker, a single carrot stick lying abandoned on the vast, barren surface of a practically-empty plate.  To me this act says "I get to be the considerate one, AND have the last chip" because undoubtedly, the last takeable chip is in fact the second-to-last chip, and anyone who takes the actual last chip is asking to be criticized by all partakers, as an asshole of behemoth proportions.  In reality, the true asshole of behemoth proportions is the one who feigns politeness, who takes what they want while simultaneously giving the false pretense of generosity.  Simply said, these monsters literally get to have their cake and eat it too.

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